I realize this post is old but I figured I would comment on it anyways. I think one of the biggest struggles for teens is to "fit in". We all want to belong and be a part of the crowd, at least for the most part. Today's culture is telling us sexy is in and modest is out.
All the movies and TV shows are showing women with their mid drifts showing and tight pants and shirts. It also shows guys not respecting women and their commitment to their spouse (Desperate Housewives, and other shows).
I think the stumbling block for women doesn't really have anything to do with how guys dress, but how they react. I don't know for sure, seeing how I'm male and not female, but it seems that girls would like the attention from the good looking guy in math class. One way to get that attention is by a combination of dress and attitude.
I think for a lot of guys our view of women is becoming jaded by "the media". Hugh Hefner has made a fortune exploiting women and turning them into objects rather than human equals. While Christian guys may not directly view women as such, their personal views are still challenged at school and elsewhere.
It seems the pressures of sex and sexiness are being sought after at a younger age. I think parents also play a big role in modesty. When children are young the parents are usually the ones that dress them. I'm seeing more little girls wearing two pieces and clothes with suggestive wording.
So, as a society we are causing some of the problem for the younger generations. We are telling the media that is okay to display women and men is a sexually charged situation (Bachelor, Big Brother, Sex and the City, and other shows). In fact some of these shows get such high ratings that the produces take the events even further.
If we aren't aware of what our children/teens are watching then we are contributing to their lack or reduction of modesty. I think one thing parents really need to do is not take anything for granted.
My kids can't use their cell phone for anything bad. Guess what, wrong. Almost every new phone comes with a camera. What happens when you get teens with hormones off the charts and a camera? You can get pictures that lead to embarrassment (sexting), plus criminal charges.
So I think the whole modesty issue has a lot more than just clothes. It includes our attitudes and reactions to the actions we get. For guys I would suggest reading the book Every Young Man's Battle, there is an updated version coming out on the 18th of August. For girls there is the book, Every Young Woman's Battle. The links are below, I also have a copy of the older version for men.
But again, modesty is more than just how we dress, it encompasses our entire being. It is our actions, our words, our dress, our reactions, our beliefs and a lot more.
This is a topic that we could spend a year covering. It has so much depth and different angles. Theresa I haven't been involved with youth group lately but have they covered this area much since February?
That is all for now, feel free to respond. The message board seems to be pretty empty, lot of topics, little discussion. Lets get talking.
http://www.amazon.com/Every-Young-Mans-Battle-Strategies/dp/0307457990/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1249494823&sr=8-1
http://www.amazon.com/Every-Young-Womans-Battle-Sex-Saturated/dp/1578568560/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1249494823&sr=8-4
Post from VSN Discussion about Modesty
Addiction to buying
Have you ever thought of yourself as addicted to buying things? Not just a pack of gum here, a new shirt there. But the desire to compile the latest technology, the latest style of clothing? I wouldn't classify myself as addicted to buying things, but rather lying to myself about simplicity.
I am constantly telling myself I could really use a flat screen LCD HDTV television because I could plug my computer into it and it would take up less space in our home. There is also the long lens I want for the camera, a new Mac that has the latest video editing equipment, a better video camera, another car, our own home, golf shoes, rechargeable battery pack for the X-box 360 controller, and the list goes on.
It doesn't help when the tv is littered with ads about what is new and what you need in your home. It is true that there are thousands of items that can make our lives easier, but do we need them? Probably not.
When Lizzy and I were first married we were within walking distance to Wal-Mart. We went there at least 2 or 3 times a week. Sometimes it was for food or a simple item. But almost every time we came home with something we didn't need. With every move into a new home, we have gotten further away from stores. Which is probably a good thing.
The accumulation of "stuff" just shows that we are gullible to the advertising, myself included. I think one of the exciting things about buying something is that you now have something new to use or look at. In our day and age we quickly become bored with stuff and need something new on a constant basis.
Lately I have been trying to sell the stuff I don't use and either save the money or put it towards something else. For instance I'm trying to sell one tv to get a better but smaller one. So in essence it's still something new, but I am trying to buy it with money from the old one.
Do we really need two TVs? Probably not, but by getting rid of one at a price I can save up for another instead of buying a new one then trying to sell the old one. In the Bible Jesus talks about how nothing we have here will go with us to heaven except our soul.
Your soul won't be able to carry your 52" HDTV with your surround sound system to heaven, even if it playing Billy Graham. I think we fail to remember that earth is our temporary home. We are essentially aliens, we do not belong here but are visiting.
I think the media puts pressure on us to buy things and our neighbors. We all look at each other and what each other has and either decides not for me, or I need to get one of those. More often than not it is probably "I need to get one of those."
For some people the addiction of buying things puts their family at risk. They max out multiple credit cards, lie to their spouse, and end up hurting the family. I encourage you to be aware of your spending, think about the need vs. the want. And if you really need to buy something new or want to, do your research. Find out where the best deal is.
It is never a good idea to buy without intention. What I mean by this is, if you walk into the store not planning to buy a tv and walk out of the store with a tv, you probably didn't need it and made a bad decision. If we only bought what we went to get we would probably save close to 1,000 dollars a year if not more. There are so many times we walk out of the store with a movie and something else we didn't need.
Spending isn't bad, just be wise about it and plan ahead.
SNL
So I've noticed lately that a lot of shows including SNL have incorporated sex/shock into their shows. Instead of being funny, they try to see how far they can push it before turning people off. I never really watched SNL before, however, we all know some of the great skits, Da Bears.
It seems lately, no one really talks about the show. Lizzy and I have turned it off multiple times due to either stupidity or too much sex themed skits. Writing a good skit isn't about pushing the limits but rather writing believable characters who people can relate too.
From the few skits I have seen, there are too many characters who are exactly the same. I'm not sure if it's the writers or the actors, but every actor's character seems to be the same from skit to skit. If I was in charge of SNL I would find multiple actors who are excellent at impromptu acting and who could feed off each other.
You want the skits where something goes unplanned and everyone cracks up. It doesn't seem like that's happening anymore. All the experienced talent left for other jobs. Jimmy Fallon, Tina Fay, Amy Poehler, etc.
I think it's either time to scrap SNL or take a break to bring in experience and variety.
Today
Why is it that we all struggle thinking about today? I think as a society we are so concerned with what will be happening tomorrow, or after we finish this. We are looking ahead so much that by the time we reach there we're no longer looking for it, but to the next ahead.
We are missing out on what is happening right now, today. I usually feel this way when I start counting down to something. I focus on that task that I often do see all that is happening around me. Take a birthday for example. Growing up kids count down the months, days, hours, and minutes until their birthday. It's usually because of presents or a party.
During their focus on their birthday they miss all the good things happening around them. This is true for adults as well. We become focused on task and miss out on ways to either help people or authentically enjoy them.
So I guess my challenge would be Matthew 6:34 New Living Translation.
“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today."
Take each day as its own and conquer each day individually. Focus on the great things of each day and cherish each day.
Conclusion to our trip
So we've been home for a couple of days now, actually closer to a week. Our last three days in Orlando were filled with theme parks and Disney. On Monday we talked with a lady at the hotel about tickets for Disney World. She said we wouldn't find a better deal anywhere else. I wasn't convinced, so Lizzy and I headed to the convention center to check out the "Nazarene Special".
We talked to the guy and tried to decide what we wanted to do. He had 2 park hopper tickets left, so we decided to get those. A park hopper allows you to go to any Disney park on any day. You can also go to more than one in a day. We never did do that ( I got sick) but at least we had the option.
As we were leaving he caught up to us and asked what we were doing for the rest of the day. My response was nothing. We had no plans expect to sit the in the hotel room or go to the pool. He said here take these and handed us 2 tickets to Sea World.
So we headed back to the hotel and got ready to go and headed out to Sea World for the rest of the day.
In short the next two days were Animal Kingdom and Epcot. We met a really cool family from Minnesota on our way to Animal Kingdom and spent the day with them. It's amazing how you can make friends anywhere and from anywhere. I got sick right before getting on the bus after Animal Kingdom. I don't know if it was just a bug or something else. But the whole day I felt off and didn't feel totally better until after we got home. But we were still able to go out and have fun.
Anyway that is just a glimpse at our last couple of days in Orlando. I'll try to get Lizzy to add to it. Or at another time I'll add to it. But right now it's late and I have to work tomorrow. So until then.
NMI Thoughts
It was reported that Orlando has over 1,500 conventions every year! Can you imagine how busy that would make this city and how many different people they must see. The Nazarene church is participating in a service project called "One Heart, Many Hands." During this service project they find things to help with all over the city. They clean up trash, help with homes, and other places that need cleaning up or repair.
http://www.oneheartmanyhands.com/
It was reported on the news that no other organization has done this kind of work for the city of Orlando. I tried to find the video from the news but couldn't find it. Anyway the church of the Nazarene did make an impact and that was what I was hoping it would do.
Also later that night during the service I was able to share a smile with another lady. I'm not sure what country she is from but we communicated through that smile. It was about halfway through the service or so when a man a row ahead of me and a two chairs to her right started to snore. It woke him up and we both looked at each other and smiled. I thought it was pretty funny. We both had the same reaction and understood what we were sharing.
6/24/09 NMI Convention
A thought from the first day of convention.
So, I walked in and the first thing I saw was a huge open room. I didn't notice that to my right were already over 1,000 people sitting. I think mos of the people here are delegates or family.
It's going to be amazing when the whole place is filled. Without a doubt this place could hold 20,000+ people. and it's not just the United States. It's a collection of global faces.
A collection of global people separated by mountains, sea, valley, but connected through spirit. Here for one purpose.
Workshops and Services
I'm listening to a man from the Caribbean talk about the issues of health and clean water. Some of the struggles they face can easily be fixed or helped by wealthier nations. The Caribbean is only a 2 hour flight from Orlando, which is where we are. We are so close to helping them, yet act as if they are so far away.
It was just announced that there are 17 delegates from Cuba that are here at the convention.
Earlier there was a lady from the Eurasia region that mentioned a topic we talked about in class last semester. It was the west asking for help from the south. Due to immigration there were people now living in her country that they didn't know how to reach. She said that her country needed missionaries from Africa, South America, and other southern countries.
The shift is starting. The west is losing the domination of the denomination. Which is great. This shift shows that Christianity is spreading, it needs this ebb and flow to survive. How long until the United States and other northern countries are asking southern countries for missionaries? I think it may happen sooner than most of us think.
Trip
Last night we arrived at Orlando airport around 11:50 or so. By the time we had our luggage and got to our waiting destination it was a little bit after 12. Orlando has a huge airport. Inside the airport there was a Hyatt hotel, we were shocked and amazed.
We waited for our luggage then stacked all the luggage together and went on our way. When I had called earlier the day the shuttle people said to go down to the counter. When we got there the desk was empty and there was no one around. I called again and they said to just wait outside. So we waited for 20 or 30 minutes until the van showed up.
By the time we loaded there were 7 of us an a van full of luggage. When we got to the hotel, it was well after 1 and only one person on duty. He was pretty distracted by the television which boasted CNN. He watched us struggle to get our 3 suitcases, baby play pen, stroller, and ourselves. Then we waited a little bit while he was distracted by the television. All throughout his focus was more on the tv than us.
But you can't really blame him. It was late at night and there wasn't anyone in the lobby. When Lizzy and I made it into the apartment it was close to 2. Cayden wasn't very happy, he missed most of his naps and didn't sleep much on the plane. He cried for a while but fell asleep close to 3. We spent today trying to get him caught up on sleep and catching all of his naps.
Today was basically a registration day and a welcoming day. Lizzy joined me for the 7 o'clock service. Dr. Jesse Middendorf gave the opening message. There was also the presentation of all the flags. It was a great sight.
We then walked back from the convention center to a nearby Walgreens to buy some snacks and breakfast food. Our total walk was roughly a mile. So it's not too bad. We are now in our hotel room watching Seinfeld and eating our snacks and some decaf coffee. I should probably head to bed so I can get up early tomorrow.
In the Airport
So we're now in the Las Vegas airport. Since our flight was delayed we missed our original connection and now have to wait 3 more hours for our next flight. One interesting thing about Las Vegas is, the moment you step off the airplane, you can hear the slot machines going.
It's kind of weird to see so many people putting money in the machines. So weird that I might try it out. They have penny slots, and we need money. So I figured why not spend 50 cents and see if we can earn some money. Plus we're both 21, and it would be an inexpensive way to waste some time.
I'll let you know if we get rich. I doubt it but it would be pretty cool. Off to find a good place to eat, hopefully a good cheap place to eat.
On the Plane
So here we are sitting on the plane, Cayden fell asleep on the plane during take off. That is a relief, without his naps he gets a little cranky and night time sleep becomes hard. We just ordered our drinks, lots of apple juice and a sprite. I’m kinda of surprised that they still offer snacks and drinks. The other day I heard one airline was considering charging for using the restroom and the throw up bags.
What happens if you don’t have the money but need to use them? Do you just do your best to hold it in, or find the best place to let it out? It’s hard to imagine the airline companies not having enough money to operate.
Once we land in Las Vegas, we’ll have a couple of hours until our next flight. We’ll need to find somewhere to eat, because so far I’ve had pop tarts, fries, and a half of a cheeseburger. It’ll be hard landing in Orlando so late (11:50), but hopefully there won’t be any confusion once we land and we’ll be able to get to our hotel and into bed.
There was another couple heading to Assembly too, however, they we were going from Boise to Salt Lake, then to Orlando. I tried to get onto that flight, but it was full. So it’ll be the waiting game for us. I wonder if you can gamble inside the airport? Maybe I could win some money for our trip?
I’ll try to keep you updated on our travels.
Packing
So it's time to pack again. We just finished moving and it's already time to pack again. This time it's for Florida. So it shouldn't be as stressful. I was elected as a delegate for the Intermountain District. I'll get to listen to meetings and decide on important upcoming topics.
This will be Cayden's second trip on an airplane. However, his first was to Spokane, so a relatively short flight compared to Orlando. We are still in the process of packing. I haven't done any work yet, except make sure the clothes were washed. Now I have to sort through the clothes and find ones that are nice and semi-casual, yet making me look like an adult (as my mom put it). I don't mind dressing up, but when it's hot and humid?
Well I better go upstairs and start the packing process. We bought the space saver bags a while ago and they work great. They save a ton of space, yet there is one issue. Just because the clothes are compact, it doesn't mean they weigh less. If you're not careful you can pack too much and get hit with the fee for an overweight bag.
I'm grateful that airline companies allow you to bring baby supplies without getting charged for it. We're flying Southwest and we can bring a playpen and a stroller without extra charge. That will come in very handy for Cayden.
Well off to packing, I'll do my best to keep this updated if anyone is interested.
Apartment
Most of you know that Lizzy and I moved, yet again. This time though we are in a bit of a predicament. We are going to have to pay double rent for essentially June and July, while taking to a trip to Orlando.
So far the whole money issue is becoming very stressful. Not only am I working less at work, but our expenses are going up a little too. This is one event that will require extreme faith. And that is the hard part. I want a solution now, I don't want to have to wait and stress for the answer.
So many of us forget to rely on our faith when needed. We know we have faith, yet when it is required, we forget we have it. God knows what He's doing, He doesn't need us telling him how He's messing up. On Saturday I read the column of someone I can't remember at this point. However, his article talked about how he thought he knew more than God.
While in fact there is no way we'll ever know more than God. He also explained how God doesn't need our help. There isn't really a way we can help God improve or know more. However, we can help God achieve His plan for our lives. We need to listen to God and wait, however, not just wait. We do need to act.
But it seems that we have become a society of want, and we want it now! God doesn't care what our society has become, he doesn't necessarily care to cater to us 24/7. We need to trust God, and his timing. He's able to see what His decisions will bring, where we can't. We make decisions then find out the result. Sometimes good, sometime bad.
So my next goal is to listen more and not drown God in my sorrows. He knows them and needs to hear them, but I shouldn't assume I know what will work. I need to rely on God for the answers. All to often I think I find the answers and just tell Him/myself, if this would happen it would all be solved. Or if I could get this kind of job and car and etc. Rely on God and let him drive the car without a backseat driver.
Orlando
Tomorrow is our last day before leaving for Orlando. It almost feels as if we will be making a pilgrimage or something like that. Thousands of people from all over the world on converging on Orlando in the next few days. I am going so I can discuss changing policies regarding NMI and the General Church.
However, I wonder what will be the impact of all of us Christians gathering in this city? What impact will we have on the city. I would hate for us to be thought of as rude, inconsiderate, busy, or plain non-loving and judgmental.
I'm hoping that instead of just staying to myself and not talking to anyone, I might actually be able to branch out some and find commonalities among people I don't know. It's going to be an exciting time and I look forward to learning some new things and seeing plenty of people I know and don't know.
I'll try to keep this updated just to let people know what is going on during our week in Orlando.
Birthday
Today we celebrated Cayden's first birthday. It is hard to imagine that it has been over a year since he was born. It's amazing to see all the things he has learned and experienced in a years time. I look forward to seeing him grow more in the future and to learn even more. The only scary part is that I am the one that needs to teach him a lot of it. I look forward to playing catch or running around with him.
I'll also look forward talking to him. Right now we can't get much out of him except raspberries and random sounds. It'll be fun knowing that he understands what I'm saying. But during all of this I have noticed one thing, we are alone among our friends. We have great friends, however, we do not have any friends our age experiencing the same life stages as us.
Of our friends that are married there are no children and no children in the near future. We are on our second, sooner than anticipated but still excited. And we also have plenty of friends that are not married. It feels hard to fit in in certain places. There's still plenty to do with our friends, however, sometimes there are things that just don't correlate yet. There are events that we have gone through or are going through that they wouldn't understand.
I'm hoping in the near future we can find Cayden some good friends. I'm sure he gets lonely playing by himself and spending all of his days without kids of similar age. It would be exciting to see him interact with kids his own age more as he gets older. I'm also hoping with all the therapy he's getting that he'll catch up and pick up some new task on his own. So lets see if we can get him crawling and eating more solid foods before baby number two comes along.
Moving Junk
Have you ever thought that your house/apartment was spotless? Cleaned to perfection? This last week I thought our apartment looked great, everything felt clean and tidy. However, we just started finished moving last night around two. We were exhausted and ready to quit. However, we now have to unpack all that "junk" before leaving for Orlando on Tuesday.
We found that we really do have a lot of items that are not necessary. We have five or more small extension cords, numerous craft boxes, three-hundred pens, and plenty of other stuff we really do not need. However, all of this stuff feels necessary. It is hard to part with our past items.
I think sometimes God watches us travel through life with all of our "junk" in tail. We are always reminded of our past failures and where we made mistakes. However, we have been forgiven of these failures if we have asked for it. God has the ability to completely forget our failures. I wonder if that is why He is able to unconditionally love us. He looks forward instead of back.
Every individual has the potential to achieve greatness, and it often depends on what they do in the future instead of the past. I think people will forget your mistakes if you fix your future. If you learn from your mistakes and improve yourself people will respect you.
Lizzy and I have figured out what we do and do not need and are getting rid of our "junk". So ask God to get rid of your junk for you as you move into a new and better life.
Do We Marry God?
Lizzy and I went food shopping today, and while at the store I heard an interesting comment. We were in the cereal aisle trying to decide what kind of cereal to buy. The next thing I heard made me chuckle, but also think. "Mommy, do we marry God?" She actually asked the question twice and I never heard what the mom answered. But after thinking about it, I would have answered yes.
When we enter into a relationship with Christ it can be referred to as a marriage.
Romans 12:5
So in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.
1 Corinthians 1:9
God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful.
1 Corinthians 6:15
Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself?
Essentially we are connected to God, we are one. In an ideal world our wants and our desires would be those of Christ. However, I would say most of us fail in this area. We are daily looking to buy things or achieve things that truly do not matter. This doesn't mean that God doesn't delight in our achievements, it just goes to say that He delights more when our achievements are also his achievements.
So many times our prayers are "God help to hear your voice and follow you and what you want for my life." However, right after that prayer we struggle with following through. He may give us an opportunity to witness, and in return we shy away and let it go.
"Why would you say we are married to Christ?"
1 Corinthians 6:19
Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
Genesis 2:24
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
When we are united with Christ, we are one body, He is in us, and we are a part of Him. So to answer that little girl, yes in a way you do marry God. However, it has to be a conscious decision. You cannot be a true follower of Christ by accident. Marriage is a sanctity, and we should treat our relationship with Christ in that way. We need to be in communion with him, constant communication and faithful to Him. Put Christ first in everything you do, especially in your earthly marriage.
So, I guess Paul was wrong, there is no such thing as a single Christian.
Just Life
Life continues to fly by. Everyday seems to go by faster and faster. Cayden is about to turn one already! It seems like almost yesterday I saw him for the first time. Also, this year marks our second anniversary, another date that is about to arrive a lot sooner than expected.
I feel like I have so much to say that I can't think of what to say. There are times I feel that I have lost the joy I used to have. It feels as if life is getting in the way of life, if that makes sense. There are so many things that require responsibility, commitment, seriousness, things that cause stress, fear, anger, questioning. We are now in a time of economic crisis, which has many of us either looking for jobs or being very cautious about our current one.
Every decision we make is based on the economy. Can we afford this, should we buy it? All of the business aspects of life sucks out the fun of life. We, or should I say I, am getting too focused on providing that I often forget about the fun. My job, my security is always on the back burner of my mind, sitting in a tea kettle, seconds away from whistling.
To make matters worse, I have been attempting to go at it alone. The one person or being I guess that can truly help me, is the one person I have left out of the equation, God. So there is the answer (the hot pad) sitting right next to the stove, waiting to be used. Yet I reach for the boiling tea with my bare hand, only to get burnt. Why not use the hot pad (God) to handle the tea kettle (life's problems)?
In Philippians chapter 4 verses 6 and 7 it talks about giving all our fears and request to God. "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
Yet I forget to do that, I forget to consult the hot pad. I realize that there will be no success in life based on my own effort. Sure on the outside it may look great, I may find worldly success. However, I know on the inside I will be a wreck, searching anywhere and everywhere for the answer.
Lord, guide me now in your path, in your direction. I'll do my best to use you to pick up the tea kettle. Let my worries fall to you, and your protection to me. Thank you for providing and for your love.
Stuff
It was Lizzy's birthday on Thursday and we went to Red Lobster for dinner. It wasn't a bad dinner, just small portions for the price. During the day Lizzy was all excited and spent a good chunk of it getting ready. Then when it came time for me to get ready. She told what I was wearing which began an argument the whole way to my parents house where the munch was to spend the evening.
For some reason I wasn't very happy being told what to wear. Anyway after discussing why I got a little upset at being told what to wear we had a very enjoyable evening. After dinner, we went to Borders bookstore just to look around until our movie started.
We went and say Paul Blart Mall Cop. There was some bad acting, but that is usually expected in a comedy film. I think there were a total of 6 people in the theater. So that was our Thursday night, nothing too special but very fun.
Boy
So my son recently found his tongue. And for him it's been a whole new experience. We never think how valuable our tongue is until we lose it. When he was born his tongue was tight and he wasn't able to really move it or stick it out. However, about two or three weeks ago he went into St. Lukes for surgery to get it clipped. Now he is able to stick it out.
Thinking about it, we never truly realize how much God does for us until we need him. So often when things are good, we ignore him. Literally, we get "busy" and put off time with Him to do other things. But as soon as our life gets "bad" we rush back to him. We need to remember that God is always there and will always be waiting. Especially when we rediscover Him.
Sick
Isn't being sick awful. Right now I am sick, or at least at times. The doctors said a GI bug, which could mean a plethora of things. Drink Gatorade and try to do some homework. Ignore the stomach and push on.
Change
Life never ask us where do you want to end up. How do you want to get there? How can I make it easier. Life seems to enjoy the surprises we face. Each and everyday we face life head on, hoping we win, hoping we can make it to another sparring session. Life is a road full of curves, take it slow and keep your eyes up.
Alone in an Empty Room
A knock. "I have your dinner tray here." A slow glance up, I'm unrecognized, for a good reason too. This man has never seen me before. But there I stand holding his food, made by people he doesn't know. His hearing aids are visible, I know I'll have to speak louder. "I have your dinner tray here." "Oh, good." I move his few visible belongs to the side of his tray to make way for his tray. "Do you want me to move it over for you?" "What?" I try again, louder, slower, "Do you want me to push this across so you can reach it?" "What? . . . Yes, yes that would be good." I slowly push his tray over his lap so he can reach his food. "Do you need any help opening anything?" "I think I can do it." "Okay." And with that I leave as if I was never there. I continue passing out the trays to other rooms.
As I walk by his room once more he notices me and calls out "Sir!" I leave the path towards the cart, towards the rest of my night, and heads towards his room. He slowly glances up at me, "I need . . . I need", the next couple of words are hushed and almost laughed out "I need to pee." "Okay" I respond, "I'll just push this button to let them know." Them being the nurses. However, his nurse was right next door already helping a patient. I tell him I'll go find someone to help him, "I can't wait too long."
The sense of urgency is building, here is a man who cannot use the restroom by himself, he can't just casually get up and walk into the restroom. Here we all are now, taking our lives, our mobility for granted. We don't think about not being able to do things on our own until it hits us.
I started my quest for a nurse that could help this man. The halls reminded me of high school and walking the halls while class was in session. They were empty, quite, and bleak. I saw one nurse, on the phone. Another, she looked free, I told her the situation and she replied, "Okay, we'll take care of it." Good I thought, he's going to get the help he needs. A few minutes later, I saw the same nurse coming out of the kitchen, pudding in hand. Her path was not one leading to the waiting man. Her path took her on a one-way flight to the break room.
Right then I was appalled. Here it is your job to help people, to comfort them in their sickness. But instead you decide to snack on your sugar free chocolate pudding. That is the last time I will go to that person for any kind of help or favor. Just moments later I hear the man's voice call for help again. I finish my last few trays and decide to head by his room to make sure everything is okay.
What I see is horrible, an event that could have been prevented if one person cared enough to let their pudding wait for them. There was blood on the floor and covering the man's gown. There were now two nurses in there wiping up the blood and making sure he was okay. The IV in his arm was ripped out as he tried to make it to the restroom on his own.
When somebody gives you urgent news or an urgent request, take it seriously, they have a reason for it. And remember to cherish what previous generations have done for us. I think about what they had to go through growing up. The Great Depression, WWII, Korean War, Vietnam War, Cold War, Recessions, Gulf Wars. Their struggles have been constant, they grew up in a unfriendly era, they made due with what they had. We need to remember that and thank them for that.
We have it easy, only now are we starting to feel a small portion of what they dealt with.